Why It’s OK to Keep Searching
Keep going. When everything is so deconstructed in and around you, your identity is no longer fixed, your future is not safe and although some things are working out and some are not, you got to keep going. You got to keep tuning yourself. Like a musician, trying to make the instrument play the right tone and after a while, he gets it, the perfect tune. The perfect melody.
If you think you are on the wrong path, you are not. You are just not there yet. And you will never be quite there, ever. Until the end. But what you choose to morph to and experience on the way Home, will be your tune, your melody and people will listen and say: That’s him, that’s her. Like a singer trying to find her own feelings, digging up the emotion and putting in the song, reaching to ecstasy and pouring out….perfection.
Realize you are still the artist even if no one knows or approves of you. It’s the same. Shitty or great work does not depend on how many people will approve of you. Shitty or great work does not depend on the amount of money you got for it. It is always coming from within you and essentially for you, until you get the perfect tune.
Stop apologizing for doing what you do. Stop finding excuses and sorry notes for all those who think you shouldn’t. People think all sort of things. Most of the time, they are not even aware of it, unconsciously cruising through your profiles, or whatever you’ve shared. They (you, me) are searching for inspiration, something that would make them feel alive and go:
I can do that to. ….That’s so cool, I’m going to try it out….. Or maybe just Silence….cries in the background (my personal favorite).
So you got to keep searching. For me. If you don’t find what you’re looking for, I might give up too.
Another thing is important. We got to keep perfecting the tune. Because if it’s not right, it’s not right. Not yet. You know when something goes against who you are as a person, when it doesn’t feel right, when you know it needs tweaking. Tweak it and in solitude, decide if it’s right. Right for who you are right now. You are probably not going to love it a couple of years from now. But that’s a good sign. It means you are growing, evolving and in that growth, you decided to leave a mark. You were not afraid to do it, even if it wasn’t perfect. Who else is going to play your tune if you won’t do it?
Live in the non-judgmental creative space. Create there and be OK with yourself. Nobody can put a price on that.
